Episode 7x12 "Family Trees"

Okay here we go, coming in with fresh eyes. I know a lot of people like this one, but there are a few issues we're going to have to address.

It's a family-wide effort to plan for Alan's birthday party, and Eric's in charge. Or so he thinks, anyway. Eric comments that their father is capable of torturing them for information after his time in the Navy, and Cory corrects him by saying he was a cook in the Coast Guard. We know for certain that Alan was in the Navy because of Kid Gloves in season 1, and being a cook would be a little anticlimactic. So I'm just gonna wildly assume that Cory is lying to try to embarrass his brother. The only alternative is that the writers are LITERAL FUCKING IDIOTS, and that just can't possibly be true.

Shawn makes his way onto the scene here in The Living Room with a snail mail letter from his mother Virna, who I think gave her last appearance in Turkey Day. She has apparently run off again since then. Cory is convinced that nothing good can come from reading this letter, but everyone else in the room thinks Shawn should read it.

Cory: "Gee mom, y'know I'm, I'm looking around the room tryin to see if anyone asked your opinion..."

Equipped with that cartilage piercing that he seems to only wear in seasons 4 and 7, Shawn does indeed the read the letter from Virna, and proceeds to inform everything that Virna is not his biological mother.

Okay, time to stop. Why did this happen? Is there a quota for torturing Shawn that has to be filled every season? Is it purely to achieve the emotional ending? Shawn was finally in a good place, he lost his best friend to Topanga but he still kept his chin up, so we gotta sucker punch him right back to the ground?

So we're three minutes into the episode and we have two things going on: Eric's contribution to the plot is that HE'S DUMB, and this unnecessary Shawn-torture. We've barely started and this episode already feels like a chore.

At The Apartment, Eric details his plan for initiating Alan's surprise party, the core of which involves poisoning Morgan and, if necessary, using pony rides to raise spirits at the party after her untimely demise.

This one goes out to the optimists among us who, like me, originally thought Eric was still believably dumb, that he hadn't changed that much. I think we can all agree that this is the final nail in that coffin. Whether or not this is funny is left up to your personal tastes, but there's no denying that Will Friedle's delivery is as perfect as ever. Long-time Comment-contributor Christian expressed disapproval with this bit, saying "this isn't fucking Family Guy." I like the comparison, this definitely smells like an "everyone hates Meg" type gag, but there was that time Cory pushed Morgan out into traffic in her miniature car. Whatever, the point is, Eric has gone way way way off the deep end.

Over in the kitchen area, Team Shawn is using that wild and wonderful internet contraption to look up Shawn's ancestry. He's got some colorful ancestors, and somehow they discover three candidates for Shawn's biological mother: Virna, who wrote him the letter stating otherwise, so she's out, Ming-Hwa, whom Shawn rules out for obvious reasons, and finally Elaine, who was apparently last spotted in Boston. Amazing thing, that internet. I like to think that Chet just kept some sort of blog where he detailed all his sexual exploits, and that's where they're getting this information.

I mean Jack's pretty excited about it there, so yeah we're talkin about pretty impressive stuff here.

Speaking of Jack, he's feeling snubbed about this whole ordeal, since he is legitimately blood related to Shawn while Shawn keeps going on about how he has no family. Shawn dismisses Jack as his "half brother," which is frustrating. Anyway they're ready to send Elaine's information to some sort of investigation agency and Shawn says he wants to go through with it. Jack asks him if it's his "final answer," which brings to mind Eric's South Park references. Funnier at the time.

X days in the future, we find Eric helping Rachel rehearse her nonsense role in Alan's surprise party, and she makes it very clear to the viewer that Eric is dumb. Shawn shows up now with the results of the investigation, but everything turned up empty. They've got no way in the world to find this Elaine person and Shawn is clearly affected by it, despite his characteristic claims to the contrary.

Shawn: "I'm leaving now. It's not some big 'Shawn Exit,' I just... got stuff to do, okay?"

What I like most about this is that everyone else knows it's characteristic. Cory knew from the start that this would end badly, and now the rest of the gang are seeing how true that was. It almost seems like a conflict in the writing for this episode. Michael Jacobs wanted this story to happen, but whoever wrote the actual script came at it with the attitude of "We're doing this story again?!" That idea is further supported by the fact this episode's writer is Matthew Nelson, who's been writing for the show since season 2, and, interestingly enough, wrote Fishing For Virna, the other episode where Shawn tries to hunt down his mother. How bout that shit?

Also, Fred Savage directed this episode, if you care about that sort of thing. I wish I knew more about directing so I could talk about the different choices they make, especially on the episodes directed by William Russ. Alas, they all look the same to me. Russ has two more episodes left, so we'll see if we can pick up on his nuances.

At home we find Eric spilling the beans about his surprise party for tomorrow, but Alan's upset since his birthday is today. But then everyone else bursts in to surprise him, revealing that they used Eric as a decoy (without his knowledge).

Amy: "We knew you'd be stupid so we used it against you."

Eric, laughing: "I was a decoy because I'm so stupid!"

Well there you go. I've said it a hundred times and now Eric himself is saying it.

Shawn waltzes into the party and everyone immediately picks up on the fact that he's drunk. He must smell like alcohol because it is not obvious to me at all. He seems perfectly fine. Shawn starts raving about how he doesn't have any parents, and then chastises himself with one of my favorite Shawn lines.

Shawn: "Gah, stop whining. I.. I hate you..."

 Whether it's economical or emotional, Shawn has always hated showing vulnerability. He always puts up his strong front like nothing's wrong, and now that he has an open display of weakness we get to see firsthand his rampaging internal struggle. This has been going on in his head for the whole series. A lot of bad shit has happened to Shawn and he hates himself for letting it get to him. Powerful stuff. Alan offers to adopt Shawn so that he can have parents again, but as we all know, the only thing Shawn hates more than showing weakness is being given pity or charity. Even though this offer is coming from a loving place, Shawn can't see it as anything other than pity/charity and makes a Big Shawn Exit. Shawn doesn't actually say anything about pity or charity, in fact he doesn't say anything at all, but Matthew Nelson has been with the show long enough to know his shit, so I'm confident that my interpretation is correct.

We find Shawn strolling the streets of Philly, and apparently it's Christmas time. This is our Christmas-time episode for the season. Shawn gives some money to a salvation army Santa, who he initially mistakes for Cory. I could spend an hour talking about the symbolism of Shawn donating money to charity, but it probably wasn't intended that way, so let's just keep going.

Cory: "I'm here."

Shawn: "I knew you would be."

It's a lovely sentiment that carries a lot of what we love about their relationship. It also instantly reminds us why they're the best on the show. When they try to do something like this with Corpanga, it never even comes close to being this good. Or even, God forbid, if Angela had tried to come talk to Shawn.

Unfortunately, that sentiment is lost relatively quickly as Cory instantly dismisses Shawn's idea to go to Chet's grave. Like, I thought this was a moment of ultimate impenetrable friendship and Cory's just like "nah I don't wanna go." So now Shawn's at the cemetery where he quickly finds Chet's ghost, and the two have a conversation about things.

This may be a massively unpopular opinion, but I don't like this scene. You know what I do like? The hospital scene with Chet and Shawn right before Chet died. And the ghost moment when Shawn goes on his road trip. That was the perfect setup, the perfect way to close out Chet's character. But now oh, here he is, just because, for a free plot device to give Shawn the answers he needs. It really takes away a lot of the impact of Chet's death. The whole reason his death hit so hard is because these two had so much left unsaid, so much to help each other through, but now... here he is, free of charge.

The scene ends with the two Hunter men finding some closure with one another. But the reason that We'll Have A Good Time Then was so amazing was exactly because they didn't have this Disney ending. That's also what made Shawn's road trip meaningful. This scene put a pretty pink bow on Shawn's relationship with his dad, and I am steadfast in the opinion that it was better without the bow. To be fair, the writing is good, it's not the cheese fest you might expect, and it is touching, I just think we were in a more interesting and compelling place before this.

Cory shows up to pay his respects, which is sweet, and the two head back to Alan's party.

Shawn declines Alan's adoption offer, saying he's got to do some repair work on the Hunter clan. I would have stopped watching the show forever if he accepted. Shawn apologizes for his earlier behavior and hands a wrapped gift to Alan. We see that it's one of those handprint things that kids give their parents.

An extremely touching moment that Eric sort of ruins with his nonsense. You couldn't put Eric on pause for ten fuckin seconds? Seriously?

Shawn asks Alan to scold him for getting drunk the way that he would scold Eric or Cory. This is one of those cases of content vs. spirit. It's really special what they tried to do here, but it ends up feeling really awkward for me watching Shawn get lectured in front of an audience of his friends. Angela joins in and it's just a whole... blech. So yeah, the spirit of this scene gets an A, but the actual content is not my favorite. The last exchange is good though.

Shawn: "Thank you sir."

Alan: "You're welcome."

William Russ really is fantastic.

Plot: 0.5 - It was enjoyable, but again, the greatest fault here is that it's completely unnecessary. The Shawn/Chet thing was in a perfect place, and we really didn't need this out-of-the-blue Shawn torture. The setup was BEYOND random.

Character Development: 1.0 - The Shawn/Chet ending didn't do much for me, but Shawn/Alan gets top marks.

Humor: 0.25 - Eric was written in the worst possible way this episode.

Life Lesson: 0.75 - Yes, I get it Boy Meets World, "you don't have to be blood to be family". You have made it clear many times now.

2.5 out of 4.0. 

I think I've said everything I want to say. The navy/coast guard thing was pretty infuriating. I may not have emphasized that enough. Fuck that.

Apparently Ben Savage was on Criminal Minds. That's a good show, I'll have to check that out.

Thanks for reading, see you Wednesday.

All images used under Fair Use.